Of course, with great soft hair also comes great sadness. My first crush comes to mind. Not that he had soft hair (that I remember), but that it was, in fact, my hair that kept my first crush from evolving into my first love.
I don't mean my first crush like when you first start to notice boys in elementary school. It's no secret that my elementary school crush was Brad S. I mean, my cousin, Tim, was friends with Brad's sister and spilled the beans. I'll never forget that fateful day on the playground when Brad approached me and said, "Your cousin said you have a crush on me!" Of course I hopped off of my swing and denied everything! My crush on Brad S. pretty much ended right there on the asphalt.
I didn't do much of that "going out" that you do in elementary school. I went to a Catholic school that boasted about 30 kids in my class. On a good day, I had to pick from 15 guys and, being the fat girl, I just couldn't compete. Truthfully, it just didn't interest me that much (I make up for this later) because I had an older sister who always had a steady boyfriend and it didn't seem appealing. I wanted to have fun and not the kind with boys (I make up for this later).
I'm talking about my first real crush. I was a freshman and Mr. Crush* was a year older than me. I first spotted him at the grocery store where he worked. He was so cute! Not traditionally cute, but SO cute. Shortly after my grocery store sighting, I noticed him riding my bus! I didn't ride the bus often and neither did he, so it took a while for the planets to align. I remember being on the bus with him a few times, he seated all the way in the back and me choosing a seat between the back and the middle. It was cool to sit all the way at the back and I was desperate to be cool, but MY CRUSH WAS BACK THERE!
I don't recall when or why he first spoke to me, but the point is that he did! Mr. Crush struck up a conversation with me. I'm sure I started to hyperventilate and said something really dorky, but we spent the next couple of days talking. I don't mean "talking" like we had deep meaningful conversations, either. It was more along the literal lines of words being exchanged between us.
One day, ONE DAY, out of the blue. THE BLUE! He says he's going to get off the bus at my stop and walk me home. Now, mind you, I grew up in a small rural town and just because we were on the same bus didn't mean we really lived anywhere near each other. He decides, of his own accord, to get off the bus at my stop and come home to hang out with me! OF HIS OWN ACCORD! I'll never forget stepping off the bus with him and walking down the street to my house. I was so excited! I felt like everyone in my neighborhood was watching me walk down Terrace Avenue with Mr. Crush. It might as well have been "the aisle" because, in my mind, that's where we were headed! I have no idea what we did or how long he stayed. I'm sure we played Nintendo or watched TV. He did call his mom to come pick him up later, but the important thing is that this started a pattern! Many days after that, he got off the bus and came home with me. We became good friends and I loved it.
A crush turning into a friend is bittersweet. Sure, you have a lot of access to them, but now they're your friend and they're friends with your friends. It's a really risky situation! My little heart never stopped pitter-pattering for Mr. Crush and every moment we spent together as friends was one step closer to me being Mrs. Crush. For the record, I'm using this marriage analogy to be funny. I had a crush on him. I wasn't being a psycho (I make up for this later).
We flirted and flirted for months, but nothing ever happened. All of the stereotypical business from that Bonnie Raitt song went on, but we just never got over the hump.
Then we went bowling. We had a snow day from school, piled into a friends car and headed to the bowling alley. We had fun! We had pizza, bowled some balls and then it happened...
Dig if you will the picture of me seated at the scoring table and Mr. Crush coming up behind me. He rests his hands on my shoulders and starts in with a little massage action. He gently pulls me back. He leans forward. He moves his cheek towards mine and brushes against my auburn curls. I just know, JUST KNOW, that I'm about to get some awkward friend-hug-cheek-kiss kind of thing and I am READY for it.
... and then he screams, "OH MY GOD! Your hair. YOUR HAIR, it's so, SO HARD! WHY IS YOUR HAIR SO HARD?!"
I was totally shocked. I couldn't breathe.
What the heck could I say!? It was the 90's - every girl had hard hair (except for the hippies). Plus, I had unruly curls and a mother who owned a salon. So, while other girls were using AquaNet and Aussie from K-Mart I was using professional grade spray. Did I mention that I had unruly curls! Of course it was hard - was there any other kind? How else was I supposed to get the bangs to stay straight up all day?
Seriously, though, is hands shot straight up in disgust and he never touched me again. We stayed friends, but any hint of a crush that he had on me ended right there in the bowling alley. Later, we grew apart and our friendship faded. We both made new friends and he grew into the kind of person I wouldn't have been interested in anyway.
I guess that moment prepared me for the future. You know, surviving broken hearts or breaking them. Making sure I didn't use too much hairspray before a date. The important stuff.
I hear Mr. Crush is happily married these days, as am I. Looking back, I can't imagine being married to anyone other than my husband. He is the greatest man I've ever known and we're bound by past hair mishaps.
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
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