Philip's Weekend Bagels

When you live in a region with a particular type of food, it's easy to take it for granted!

I remember when I moved to NY from Indiana.  One day at work, I turned to a co-worker and said,  "Where can I get a good tenderloin sandwich?"  The blank stare on her face made me realize that I was living in a land without my beloved breaded pork tenderloin sandwich!  

We are now back in Indiana and there are tenderloins available on every corner.  I've probably only had 3 or 4 in the two years we've been back, but just knowing they are there is what matters!

It didn't take long before the local bagel shops weren't cutting it for us.  They weren't like the chewy bagels we had grown to love.  They were more like rolls with a hole in them and seeds on top!  

Thus began my foray into creating the perfect bagel recipe.  We had some stumbles along the way, but now I'm able to turn these babies out with my eyes closed.  If you fail the first few times, don't give up.  Chances are you won't end up with inedible product, but you will get a feel for the dough and that's the hardest part.

Here's a horribly filmed and produced video of the process!

Philip’s Weekend Bagels

This recipe calls for specific flours available through King Arthur, but you could make it with 3 cups of your favorite bread flour.  The results will not be a true chewy bagel, but it will still be delicious!

Dough:

2 cups King Arthur Unbleached Bread Flour

1 cup Sir Lancelot High Gluten Flour

1 ½ teaspoons Salt

2 tablespoons White Sugar

2 tablespoons Non-Diastatic Malt Powder (Optional, but highly recommended.  It’s the secret!)

2 ¼ teaspoons Instant Yeast (If you use Active Dry yeast, proof it in water with the sugar)

1 to 1-¼ cups Warm Water

Topping Options:

Minced Onion, Caraway Seeds, Poppy Seeds, Sesame Seeds or Coarse Salt.  I use the Everything Topping from KA Flour!

Egg Wash:

1 Egg White

1 tablespoon Cool Water

Boil:

Large pot of water

2 tablespoons Non-Diastatic Malt Powder (or 2 each of Brown Sugar and Baking Soda)

Combine flours, salt, sugar, Non-Diastatic Malt Powder and yeast into mixer with dough hook attachment (or stir together in large bowl).  Add 1 cup of warm water until dough comes together, it will be smooth and not sticky.  If the dough isn’t coming together, add a little more warm water until it does.  Using the dough hook or by hand, knead for 5 – 7 minutes. 

Let rise in bowl, loosely covered with cling film, for one hour.  The dough will swell and smooth out, but it will not double.  Divide the dough into equal pieces for 6 large bagels or up to 10 small bagels.  (I weigh my dough and then portion it, by weight, into 8 pieces.)  Roll each portion into a ball and flatten slightly.  Rest for 30 minutes. 

Place dough in fridge for up to 24 hours. *

When you’re ready to bake, remove from fridge and rest for 30 minutes.

Poke a hole into each dough ball and twirl on your finger to create a 1 ½- to 2-inch hole.  Place on parchment or silpat lined baking sheet and rest for 1 hour. 

Preheat oven to 375˚.  Combine egg white and water in small bowl, set aside.

While dough is resting, bring a large pot of water to a steady, low boil.  Stir in 2 tablespoons Non-Diastatic Malt Powder (or Brown Sugar or Baking Soda).  Drop bagels into water and boil for 30 seconds on each side.  Drain on a clean towel and return to lined baking sheet.   When all bagels are boiled, brush lightly with egg wash and then sprinkle on your desired topping. 

Bake for 12 minutes, rotate pan and bake for another 10 – 15 minutes or until bagels are golden.             

* It is not necessary to retard the dough in the fridge, but it allows the flavor to develop and it makes a delicious bagel.  It also helps if you want hot bagels early in the morning because there’s less work to do!  If you want to bake your bagels right away, just go ahead and make your holes and continue on to your 1 hour of resting before boiling. 

Variations:

Cinnamon Raisin:  Use brown sugar instead of white sugar, add up to 1 tablespoon good cinnamon and ½ cup raisins, which have been soaked and well drained.   (What?  Rum soaked, you say?  Maybe!)

Jalapeno Cheddar:  Add a minced Jalapeno and ½ cup of shredded Cheddar. 

Chocolate Chip:  Use brown sugar instead of white sugar, add ½ cup mini chocolate chips.  

Peanut Butter Pretzel Chip Cookies

I am on a cookie craze!  Today, I came up with these little numbers.


I know that Chocolate Chip Cookies are the most favored cookie in all the land, but they have never been one of my favorites.  I think I've finally realized that I either like a very basic cookie - sugar or shortbread, or a crazy cookie full of things like candy and pretzels!  

Peanut Butter Pretzel Chip Cookies

Ingredients:

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1 cup butter or margarine, softened

3/4 cup granulated sugar

3/4 cup packed brown sugar

1 cup creamy peanut butter

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 large egg

1 (12 ounce) package milk chocolate chips
1 cup thin pretzels, broken into small piece

1 cup Reese’s Pieces

Directions:

Heat oven to 350 degrees F.

Combine flour, baking soda and salt in small bowl.  In large mixer, beat butter and both sugars until creamy.  Add peanut butter and vanilla extract .  Add eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in chips, pretzels and candies. Drop by rounded tablespoon onto ungreased baking sheets.

Bake for 6 minutes and switch pans on racks.  Back for 5 – 6 more minutes or until golden brown. Cool on baking sheets for 5 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool completely.

Crispy Chocolate Peanut Butter Cookies

I've had a real hankerin' to bake cookies recently.  Not so much a hankerin' to eat them, but the desire to bake is strong in this one.  Unfortunately, after they are finished, the desire to inhale them is not far behind.

Lots of "new" cookie recipes are running around out there.  You know, not just chocolate chip or peanut butter or snickerdoodles.  Of course, I'm not talking about those quinoa raisin nut types either!  I'm just not there yet, folks.  

My main problem with recipe searching is that I never find quite what I want.  My stuffed peppers and bagels will attest to this.  Most creations never make it to paper, though.  Some shouldn't.  This time, though, I had a winner.

Crispy Chocolate Peanut Butter Cookies

Make sure you have this stuff:

2 sticks Unsalted Butter Softened

1/2 cup White Sugar

1-1/2 cup Brown Sugar, Packed

1 cup Peanut Butter (I used creamy.  Chunky would work.)

2 whole Large Eggs

1 Tablespoon Vanilla Extract

1-1/2 cup All-purpose Flour

1/2 teaspoon Baking Soda

1 teaspoon Baking Powder

2 teaspoons Salt

1-1/2 cup Regular Oats

1-1/4 cup M & M's

1-1/4 cup Chocolate Chips

3 cups Rice Krispies

Then do this with it:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Cream butter with sugars until smooth, add peanut butter and mix until combined.  Add eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Add vanilla and beat.

Combine flour, baking soda, baking powder, and kosher salt.  Alternate adding flour mixture and oats into the creamed butter until combined, but not over-mixed.  Add candies and chocolate chips using “stir” cycle or by hand.  Finally, stir in Rice Krispies at the very end, mixing until just combined.  Do not over mix!

Use a large spoon or cookie scoop to scoop dough onto a cookie sheet.   Bake 11 – 13 minutes until golden.  Take to work the next day.

Shout out to Pioneer Woman's Monster Cookies, Gaby Dalkin's Dad's Kitchen Sink Cookies and Paula Deen's Monster Cookies for inspiration.

The Brooklyn Bridge

I stumbled on this amazing picture of the Brooklyn Bridge today.  These are painters, working on the cables of the suspension bridge.  I don't know who took it back in 1914, but kudos them!  It made me think of the fascinating history of the bridge and those who built it.

Construction started in 1870 and was completed in 1883.  It crosses the East river, linking Manhattan and Brooklyn.

The bridges designer sustained an injury in the beginning building process and subsequently passed away.  He passed the job of building the bridge to his young son.  The son also sustained injury and was unable to supervise the construction.  His wife, Emily Warren Roebling, stepped in learning mathematics and acquiring unique knowledge of bridge construction.  The legend is that she cared for her husband during the day and, at night, went to oversee the construction of the bridge.

It was opened 130 years ago and almost 150,000 vehicles still cross the bridge each day.

Here's a picture I took of the bridge when I lived in NY.  What looks like scaffolding below the bridge was a temporarily art project of waterfalls constructed below the bridge.

I've often heard that the limestone used in the construction of the Brooklyn Bridge is the famous Indiana Limestone.  However, I think this is a common misconception.  Perhaps a mix up with the Empire State Building and Flatiron Building which DO feature Indiana Limestone.

A funny side note, the Sherman Minton bridge that crosses the Ohio River between Kentucky in Indiana was completed in 1962 and had to be closed in 2011 for extensive repairs.  The Sherman Minton bridge carried about half the number of vehicles per day.  I think that they could have used Emily Warren Roebling.

Cake Batter Truffles!

I saw a few recipes online that lead me to this little number.  It's a winning combination of a few different recipes.


Firstly, let me just tell you - these are SO good.  I took them to a holiday party last night and they were a huge hit.

Cake Batter Truffles

1 box yellow cake mix

1 stick unsalted butter, softened

¼ tsp. vanilla

¼ c. sugar

2 – 3 tbls. milk, half & half or cream

2 tbls. candy sprinkles, divided

1 package vanilla candy coating

Cream together butter, sugar and vanilla with electric mixer.  Mix in entire box of yellow cake mix.  Add milk 1 tbls. at a time until you have a stiff dough.  (The temperature and humidity of your house will depend on what you need, so it might change each time you make the recipe.)  Stir in 1 tbls. candy sprinkles.

Roll dough into ¾” balls and chill for at least 15 minutes.  You could make these a day ahead, but you would want to cover them.  Once you are ready to coat, remove from fridge and allow to rest for about 15 minutes. If you try to coat super cold middles with warm candy coating, they will expand and crack.  NO GOOD!  

Melt vanilla candy coating and coat the cake batter balls, immediately topping with remaining sprinkles.

J. Nichols Clay Botanicals Facebook Page Giveaway!

Wow!  Jimy Nichols is giving away a Primrose valued at $150.  That's a lot of scratch!


You can gain entries by sharing the Facebook Page!  The new fans you recruit "like" the page and cast a vote for you.  


Here's his website:


http://jnicholsclaybotanicals.com/ 


Here's the rules:


http://jnicholsclaybotanicals.com/index_files/Page286.htm

Haters Gonna Hate!

My friend blogs over at skirt.  Recently, she crafted a little something based on the announcement of a new book.  

Maggie Goes On A Diet is exactly what it sounds like.  A book about a chubby young girl that goes on a diet.  

I'm not very interested in talking a lot about the book.  I mean, I think the book is ridiculous because it portrays a fat, insecure "loser" who diets and then becomes successful and "popular."  She develops a positive self image because she's thin now.  Isn't that nice?  Because only thin and/or attractive people are allowed to feel good about themselves, darn it!  Everyone knows that.

Any parent who buys this book for their child - weight problem or no weight problem - are assholes.  Enough about that.  Whoever the d'bag who wrote it is has gotten enough free press.

What this blog is about is fat hate, which is what I believe the author of Maggie Goes On A Diet suffers from.  Now, I know what you're thinking.  I'm fat, so I'm angry at the world.  Blah, blah, blah.  You're right.  I'm fat.  I often suffer from extreme bouts of "angry at the world," but that has nothing to do with me being fat.  It has to do with people not knowing how to drive, behave, control their kids, chew with their mouths closed, etc.  

I take no issue with (most) people who hate fat people.  I say most because I think fat hate has two categories.  Let's call them normal fat hate and abnormal fat hate.

Normal Fat Hate

Normal Fat Hate is just normal folks who hate fat people.  They really don't like looking at fat people.  They make fun of fat people.  We gross them out.  It's totally cool.  They are well within their rights to not like something.  Normal Fat Haters don't obsess.  They don't sit at home and hate fat people.  They see one in the wild, they laugh and they move on.  Those with NFH won't befriend fatties, but they might acquaint themselves at a distance.  You know, a friend-of-a-friend is friends with a fatty who ends up at the restaurant with you.  Six Degrees of Fatty Separation.  Normal Fat Haters can deal.  They might not love it, but they deal.  

For the record, some things I hate:  kids, cheese, bible-thumpers, Tom Brady, bigots, democrats and fat people who drink diet coke.

Examples of Normal Fat Hate:

I love Jeff Lewis and his show Flipping Out.  I have never missed an episode.  I think Jeff has the greatest sense of humor.  Aside from being super creative and a savvy businessman, both things I respect.  Jeff hates fat people and he talks about it regularly.  He claims to be nervous around them.  He openly says that he doesn't hire staff members who aren't "fit" and "attractive."  I adore his openness and love that he says this and doesn't care what anyone thinks!  I'd love to have dinner with him one day, you know, if he can stand it.  

Other favorite normal fat haters of mine are from the Opie and Anthony Show on XM.  Hosts Anthony Cumia and comic foil, Jim Norton are serious fat haters.  Opie makes fat jokes, but he doesn't jump on the fat roll as often as Anthony and Jim.  I subscribe to XM specifically for this show.  That means, essentially, I pay to listen to them make fun of fatties and I will continue to do so.  They are offensive, sardonic and beyond hilarious.  I love them.  

Abnormal Fat Hate:

Abnormal Fat Hate is an obsession.  A sickness.  Someone with AFH will sit at home and dwell on fat people and their hatred of them.  It might drive them to do something like write a book about a lil girl that goes on a diet.  

Example of Abnormal Fat Hate:

Someone who I used to really love suffers from AFH and it breaks my heart.  Anthony Bourdain is a chef/TV personality who I used to admire.  To me, he was sarcastic, sexy and engaging.  I voraciously read his books.  I loved his TV shows.  I even watched the few episodes of the Fox show "Kitchen Confidential" based on his book of the same name.  Now, I used to think he suffered from NFH, but I recently opened a book of his and began reading it.  I came to the second chapter and couldn't get past the first few paragraphs.  

Excerpt from The Nasty Bits by Anthony Bourdain:

The Evildoers

"I'm on the subway after a long, hard day in the kitchen, my feet swelling up like twin Hindenburgs; my back killing me; fourteen hours of hot, sweaty, uncomfortable toil and two hundred eighty dinners under my belt; and I want to sit down.  There are three seats in front of me in the crowded subway car.  Unfortunately, one miserable, fat bastard is taking up all three of them.  As he sits glumly but defiantly in a center seat, his gigantic butt cheeks and thighs spill out of the molded plastic bucket onto the seats on both sides, and his beady eyes dare me to try and squeeze my bony ass into one of the narrow spaces next to him.  

Dream sequence:  I'm on a packed commuter flight and we're going down for a forced landing in a Midwestern cornfield.  Engine one is on fire, the cabin fills up with smoke, panicky passengers overturn their meal trays as they rush the emergency exits.  The pilot manages to plow the plane belly-down onto soft earth, but when the plane - in flames now - comes to a full stop and the emergency doors pop free, the three hundred pound ectomorph in the window seat becomes lodged firmly and inexorably in the small doorway.  At the head of the aisle, another giant fuck collapses wheezing on to the floor, blocking egress.  As my hair catches fire, the last thing is see is jiggly cremulated back fat."

I'm not sure how the book continues.  I read and loved the first chapter, but couldn't go on - even having picked it up 4 or 5 times to start fresh.  My thoughts were consumed with how much hate someone has to have in them to write this and dedicate a page in their book to it.  What was he thinking when he was writing this?  I think he felt dirty, disgusted and smug.  I thought about the editors and publishers.  Did this not make them squeamish like it did me?  

It's beautifully written, isn't it?  I mean, you can't deny that your mind takes you right into the subway car, standing next to Anthony Bourdain.  If I close my eyes, I can smell it and I see what he sees, but I also notice a woman taking up three seats for her nap.  I can't miss the man with the backpack taking up the seat next to him.  I also see the "ectomorph" and catch his beady eyes, but instead of seeing a challenge... I see that he is apologetic and even maybe a little embarrassed.

You'll notice that I didn't link to the book that prompted this whole thing.  Because I don't feel like that person is deserving of the attention.